15.

Dear Sharon,

it's been awhile, and so much has changed, but so much is still the same. my mind races constantly these days, fuelled by a need to fill things, fill needs, change the world, among many other seemingly unachievable quests. part of me accepts that it is the burden of the dreamer to give up many of those dreams the gives such birth to, but must we let our offspring flounder in the dust, or is there a more merciful way to not dream these dreams in the first place?

crypticism is a shroud i seem unable to shed.

see through my riddles. it would be nice if someone could once in a while :)

always much love and affection.

A.

14.

My dearest Alfred,

I hope you'll find inspiration and motivation despite the momentary setbacks you may be experiencing in your life. Fear is a form of deprivation that sometimes drives us to go beyond the boundaries and into the skies and beyond. Why do you fear things that are beyond your control? Hold on to your beliefs, and I know that you will soon find yourself back on the pathway (be it a rough or smooth journey) where you may focus all your strength and energy again.

Oh well, but I am no Feng Shui master. We'll leave that to Lilian Too.

But what I do know for sure, is that you are destined for great things in life, my dear. I pray you'll find greatness in all you do, but be sure, whenever you turn your head around, I will be there.

I send you all my affection from my room that although stifles me at times, here I am, seated thinking of you.

Sharon

13.

my dearest sharon,

i fear that my life is now run by fear itself. every action i take seems to bear with it a multitude of consequences which seem ever so crippling. i hate to be the pessimist and i do see the opportunities behind every choice i make but i can't afford to lose these things which are so precious to me right now. and yet its this very fear that makes me question the value of these things which i claim i hold dear. 

why do i not feel the confidence i used to when i think of the things i do for the goals that i've set? where has my life and spirit gone? it seems i've lost all motivation and nothing drives me anymore.

but there is one fear that is greater than the rest. one final fear that is strong enough to drive me to disregard the others. i must be blunt at this juncture. and what i say may cause rammifications which i am prepared to accept. i fear much in my life now, but the greatest fear i feel i cannot bear..

..is the fear of losing you.

Alfred

p.s. tell 'sharon' that this letter is rather close to the present reality.

12.

Dear Alfred,

What troubles you at home? Share them with me, and let me lighten your burdens, and even if I can't, at least you have someone to carry them with. Your dreams, your fears, throw them all on me, and I will pick them up even if you smashed them on the floor; I will pick up those tiny pieces and string them together. You've been telling me of these worries you have, so share them with me. Don't worry, your secrets will be safe with me. I will ensure they will be placed in a secret place within the confines of my heart. But first, you have to trust me enough to confide them in me. So don't keep your secrets to yourself, for I have secrets too that I would love to tell.

Affectionately,
Sharon

11.

sharon,

i'm so sorry, i messed things up so badly. i never should have said what i said, no one deserves to behave like that. i was in a very bad place and my mind just couldn't handle all the things that were happening around me.... and i took it out on you...

i'm going through a lot these days. there's trouble at home and things outside don't look too good either. i wish i could talk to you about them but time is not a friend and courage rarely stays long with me. but just thinking of you is enough to sooth my soul at times. my thoughts of you are often vivid and i must say i fear the portent of my dreams, perhaps in time, as things get better, i may share these dreams with you.

Alfred

10.

Dear Alfred,

Everything doesn't have to be so messed up. We can always start anew, so don't worry about getting caught up in other things that have been keeping you away from writing to me. I'm relieved to hear from you, but discovering you in such a condition worries me as well. You don't have to face everything by yourself. Consider me a confidante and friend, and write to me, share your woes with me. I hope to hear from you soon.

Affectionately,
Sharon

9.

dear sharon.

oh god...

i'm so sorry

so sorry

i think you're hot.

i'm so lost.

i just woke up. since the eve.

i really admire you, i love your strenght, i love your determination, i love the way your arms don't sway when you walk. i love that black jacket you have that has all those patterns on it.

i'm so drunk

i'm so sorry, i didn't mean to lose control for this long. things have been tough, i've been so caught up in my own shit that it's fucked anything i've promised you. thats so messed up and i'm so sorry i didn't know how it got to this i need you so much

fuck...

ham.